Thumbed Crusader
(noun, vulgar)
a deviant, typically of sub-continental origin, who derives particular s-xual pleasure from the act of -n-lly-violating females using his thumb (the opposed, short, thick finger with only two phalanges).
“sen, the thumbed crusader, came home to de-grease his favourite appendage following an active night of thumb-crusading.” {modern – 2oth c.}
a popular, mythical creature from s-xual exploit folklore fame who fights for the rights of digital date dwellers.
the thumbed crusader added another notch to his thumbnail after nailing a hot bleached blond (-rs-).
the slang term for a person who forays into the backdoor of wanton vixens, with the goal of altering the pigmentation of his thumb, because he is too cheap to enlist the services of a tanning salon.
usually repeats the action until the desired shade of brown/tan is obtained. will also giggle gleefully once successful.
“the thumbed crusader pursued her -ss with great vigour, an image of perfect thumb brownness at the forefront of his mind…”
one who repeatedly inserts his digit into a womans -ss. will often bring out the thumb on a first date meaning that a second date will usually not occur
sh-m- eagerly explored catherine’s chocolate starfish with his thumb. from this day forth, he was to be known as the thumbed crusader.
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