Trumpet Warrior


a derisory name for someone with the the unfortunate affliction of possessing an abnormally large nasal breathing apparatus attached to their chevvy – i.e someone with a huge, f-ck-off nose.
once upon a time, there lived an old puppeteer who was very skilled in the art of making little wooden boys. one puppet was made and granted magical powers so it came to life, however when he told lies his nose grew to obscene proportions.

pinocchio: oi geppetts, was out boozing last night, only went to the blue anchor, pulled and nailed this gorgeous midget puppet all last night, she was r-mm-ng me then we just stayed up doing loads of cl-ss a’s.
geppetto: f-ck off trumpet warrior

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