Turtle Man


a you tube celebrity that wades in drainage ditches to hunt snapping turtles. he is currently up to 1.8 million hits. he might be one of the biggest hillbillies of all time. his technique is to feel out the turtles with his feet and then yank them up and shriek out loud. heeee-yip!

turtle man quote – ” i try not to smile cause i got ma teef knocked out by a chain saw.”
did you see the turtle man get bit by that huge snapper?
when having s-x with your partner right before ejaculating, you grab the back of their head and do to the turtle man call (yeeeeyeeeeyeee.) and then pin her down so she can’t bite you and the -j-c-l-t- right into her face and scream live action. when complete with the deed, carefully wrap up the catch with the comforter, remove from the house and release safely into the wild completely naked and unharmed
i brought that girl back from the bar and gve her the turtle man.

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