Uhmerica

uhmerica is a game played by only the most patriotic of americans.

it involves somebody (usually a h-m-s-xual) who stands on a hill. he then proceeds to throw an orange nerf football straight into the air at the ground below. at the ground below, usually stands 2 or more very attractive kids (one must have either gl-sses or live in california). you are awarded points by the h-m- on the hill depending on how nice the catch was, or if you made a nice block.

1 point – standard catch
2 points – running catch or block
3 points – running and diving catch or a deflection off of a tree branch
4 points – injury involved catch
5 points – fastly thrown catch, aimed directly at your b-lls
6 points – faster thrown catch, aimed directly at your head and/or b-lls
7 points – extremely fast thrown catch, aimed directly at your b-lls
you can lose points aswell as earn them. if you give one of the players trying to catch the ball, “the buisness” you are deducted 1 point. “the buisness” is when you are rough housing with another player, pushing, shoving, verbal abuse, or slapping of the b-ttocks.
george: “hey are you gonna watch the hockey game tonight?”

lawrence: “h-ll no man, uhmerica is being shown on cbc, i’m h-lla watching that”

george: “what’s uhmerica?”

lawrence: “oh beans i forgot your from germany, sorry you wouldn’t know adolf”
it’s dogsh-t sp-ckled in a f-g’s -ss and force fed to you
this whole d-mn c-ntree uhmerica and everyone in it sucks f-g -sshole dogsh-t thru a straw

especially the govt and almost the entire population