United States of Canada


all the blue states that voted for kerry in the 2004 election… the states that are so embaressed that bush won the election and wish they belong to canada instead.

contrasted to all the red states, called jesusland.
after the election, a new map was drawn showing the united states of canada and jesusland.
where former jesuslanders go when they realize that the government is supposed to take care of everybody by forcing money from those who have it and giving it to those who don’t.

contrast with jesusland where people think that the church is supposed to take care of everybody by extracting money from anyone who will listen and building a bigger cathedral than the jones’ church down the street.
i moved to the united states of canada after my preacher took my baby’s milk money and bought an xbox for his church’s new million dollar youth building.
a country which the united states and canada together.
ruled under dictatorship.
government includes dictator, vice dictator, and speaker of the house.
national anthem- riot- three days grace
national flower- balloon flower
national bird- macaroni penguin
the united states of canada is the best country in the world!
a joke that some democrats tell about their states joining more liberal nations. in reality it would be stupid for democrats to give up all control of the most powerful nation in the world, and it would be years before voter trends in “jesusland” would allow even a single blue state to exist.

but alas this joke is taken seriously by young democrats who have never had a taste of defeat in politics, or just are too stupid to understand the difference between a joke and a demand.

had the republicans lost i don’t doubt the young among them would seriously think about abandoning california as a state.
we lost the election! now we’re gonna secede!
a sad, pathetic attempt by liberals to cope with the fact that their own self righteousness doesn’t actually mean that they are right. instead of graciously admitting that they are infact a minority in america, they would rather take their toys and go home, as evidenced by the “usc”, similar to the southern states succession, but without the backbone to actually do anything about it except talk.
liberal weiner: ” i’m not an american anymore, i voted for kerry and im a usc citizen.”
rational moderate: “well, kerry was a bad idea to begin with, maybe next time the democrats will have a real contender i can vote for. oh well, back to work.”
religious conservative: “i’m glad this whole election is over, now we can get on to things that matter like fixing social security and the national sales tax and breaking up the pharmaceutical compny/insurance stranglehold on medical care.”

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