Universal Excuse


an interchangable excuse system used to get out of any situation. the combinations are as a plentiful as the person’s imagination.

the excuse creator simply picks the first part such as “i promised my landlord” then chooses from a host of endings such “i’d help him move his refrigerator down 5 flights of stairs.” or “i’d stop by to help him shave his back hair.”
universal excuse can be used as follows:

randy “hey steven you wanna go down to the pond and do some dynamite fishing?”

steven “i would randy but i told my girlfriend i’d…(pause to make up second part of excuse) help her pick out some nail polish later on.”

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