US Townie

the united states version of a townie. if not homeless, us townies rarely if ever leave the street corner that they live on, and essential spend their time pestering girls to f-ck them, pestering store owners in general, trying to start fights, and hustling people for cash to buy weed. speaking of which, us townies are always pathetically dest-tute, yet refuse to either get a job or quit smoking pot every day, so they end up begging and bullying everyone they’ve ever seen before to give them cash til they can come up with ten bucks or trying to get them to “smoke them up” or offering to “throw down”, by which they usually mean give you a buck or two, to smoke up with you and hog the blunt until they smoke 3/4 of it. their poverty also makes it impossible for them to smoke in any reasopnably safe or secluded location, meaning that nearly all of their 12-a-day smoke “sessions” happen in “the spot” which is an alley between a bank and a burned-out theater or “the other spot” which is behind two trees on the edge of a parking lot. oh yeah, they hustle for booze a lot too, and spend at least 3 hours a day asking everyone with facial hair to buy them 40s. they are rarely, if ever, older than 16. their lives are as repetetive as humanely possible.
hey, look at those townies. let’s not get anywhere near them, one them talked to me before which means i’ll have to explain to him 12 times why i’m not giving him any cash.