Viarrhea


the consequence from having chosen to dine at taco via. more often than not the decision to eat at this establishment will result in “the five stages of viarrhea”:

(1) happiness: complete and blissful euphoria from having consumed such deliciousness.

(2) fear: having known that what you just ate probably wouldn’t be recommended feed for most useless farm animals, you begin to wonder if you’ve made a drastic mistake.

(3) bargaining: though you haven’t been to church since you were 10, you attempt to speak with g-d. as a last resort you promise to never look at online p-rn again if he allows the inevitable to p-ss without consequence.

(4) anger: now that you’ve realized that g-d doesn’t exist, you’re angry that something such as the “taco dog” does.

(5) acceptance: your fate is finally sealed. your life has been moderately eventful. you contact your immediate family and say your goodbyes. you also track down “the one that got away” and confess your love.
bobbything: “i’m going to taco via today.”
hoopshooter: “ugh. you’re going to get the viarrhea, you know.”
bobbything: “it’s worth it.”

(10 hours later, curled up in the fetal position)

bobbything: “not worth it.”

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