Western Sydney
the ghetto area of new south wales australia. western sydney includes the suburbs of blacktown, mount druitt, rooty hill, seven hills and many, many more of those little known suburbs to the west of sydney hence the name, western sydney.
the area is inhabited by swarms of western sydney lads, dole bludgers, drug dealers and of course the middle cl-ss working australians who manage to live day to day without getting shot; an admirable achievement in an place such as this one.
the three main survival techniques for those who dwell in the area and are not the aforementioned sc-m are as follows:
1. lock all doors and windows at all times. bars are optional but always a plus.
2. never look anyone in the eye, and keep your mouth shut – many of the lads or bludgers have an amazing ability to misinterpret something as simple as a ‘good morning’ as a racial slur that requires a nice bashing.
3. never leave the house after 8:30pm unless in a car that can be securely locked. this is the time when you would be in the highest danger. lads, stoners etc. are known to prowl the streets at night and become highly violent during moonlight hours. it is widely accepted that the mystical beams of the moon give them strange powers they themselves do not know how to control (obviously).
on this episode of man vs. wild, bear grylls be dropped of in the middle of western sydney.
bear: f-ck that, i’m not going near that sh-t !
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