White People Problems
as defined by the great louis ck in his concert film “hilarious”, these problems affect americans in the middle to upper cl-ss. this is when your life is so amazing, that you make sh-t up to be upset about.
“why do i have to choose a language on the atm machine? this is bullsh-t, i shouldn’t have to do that!”
this is in sharp contrast to real problems, experienced by people in other countries.
my english professor didn’t truly grasp the depth of my thesis statement! …by the way i know this doesn’t matter at all, i’m just telling you my white people problems.
a. events or situations which are deemed overly taxing to only white people.
b. non-issues and scenarios which are deemed dire enough by white people to vent about via facebook, twitter, therapy sessions, and any other time they may have someone else’s brief attention.
my god. i have had the longest day of meetings and phone calls. it’s 4pm and it took the baristas – who know i come in at this time every afternoon – 10 minutes to make my triple machiatto with extra dry foam…. and honestly, the foam wasn’t even that dry.
fml. struggling today.
= white people problems
when you have a flat tire in your bmw. or when your dry cleaning is over-starched. or when your f-g drink at starbucks isn’t non-fat and you get upset.
i just got offered a promotion that will double my salary, but i’ll have to move and postpone closing on my new house. uggghhh such a white people problem.
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