yuletard


the name given to the perennial christmas cretin who, much to your shivering dismay, persists in overbearing, glib and frequently forceful christmas related antics, throughout the whole of december. they are usually to be found in the workplace, probably nearest to the radio which will be blaring yuletardenous songs of redundant festive delight, whilst they don their sparkly f-cking reindeer antlers and gibber about how f-cking lovely it all is.
meanwhile an insignificant and tremendously vapid war of who can send their christmas cards around the office first wages. yuletards!
a few common examples of the behaviour of a yuletard (of which there are many, go on, i bet you know lots too):-
turning the radio up at work when a christmas song comes on; enjoying it; making reference to it; wearing f-cking ironic christmas headwear about it; displaying every f-cking christmas light you’ve ever seen outside their house which, unbeknownst to them, only really serves to advertise to potential burglars that ‘hey, if we’ve got money to throw away on sh-tty christmas lights and huge santas, imagine what presents you could steal’; discussing in minute detail every trail and f-cking tribulation of their cretinous christmas shopping expedition, right down to where they had their dinner; turning up for work in their woefully embar-ssing santa’s little helper outift; banging on and f-cking on and on and on about every little thing they are going to do, see, eat, wear, watch, drink, say over christmas, thus sucking any possible pleasure to be had out of the occasion for them and every poor sod in earshot, including me, hence this.

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