armchair mercenary
an individual, typically male, who incessantly second guesses the outcome of military battles recreated on television. often addicted to the history channel, has never served in the armed services, but is an active member of the nra, an avid gun collector, yet doesn’t hunt. can be somewhat oblivious to spousal interests or needs.
armchair mercenary: “bla, bla, bla, then you know honey, if brigadier general warren’s scouts hadn’t found little round top undefended, then colonel vincent wouldn’t have led his brigade up the hill and set up a picket line. if general lee’s troops had just arrived there, say, just 10 minutes earlier, 20 tops, the battle of gettysburg would have been a confederate victory! the rest would be history! hey, grab me another beer, would ya?”
wife: “you are sooo smart, snook-ms! you’re my favorite armchair mercenary! get your own beer, but just one! remember? i’ve got to go, uh….. go and visit my sick friend again.”
armchair mercenary: “hey, what if the rebel snipers had had barrett 50s with match ammo? where’d i put the remote?
Read Also:
- Jiz Plate
when you buy a license plate on ebay just to paint it the same color as your car, then you put a material-wasting, sad paint job on it, just to have some newb steal it and paint it pink. then you -ssume the guy stole it because you are convinced that he wants you and […]
- Irish Thief
one who is irish and tends to wear multiple irish rings at one time. he/she is coined a thief because the rings are placed on random fingers such as thumbs, pinkies, forefingers, and are being worn at the same time (as if this person has just stolen all of these rings). “paddy….. you got a […]
- Jizz Box
an empty box of tissues used to unload m-st-rb-t-d seamen. my girlfriend was completely disgusted to find my j-zz box under the bed – i reminded her it’s grosser to unload on the carpet. 1 more definition a box of used condoms. randy gayer than aids peck, keeps a box of used comdoms in his […]
- Kelvington
sometimes refered to as k-town, but most often reifered to as the sh-t hole from which any human being would be glad to escape from. full of hockey playing egotistical -ssholes. located somewhere in the middle of nowhere about an hour north west ish from yorkton, saskatchewan. fin. i dunno it’s kelvington
- Priss Drinker
someone who sips an alcoholic beverage. these people are also called a “b-tch” for not properly drinking their alcohol. blondes,white women,priss drinker