also known as lpo, typically work for retail stores, specializing in the recovery of merchandise and the apprehension of the shoplifter. typically dressed in plain clothes to blend in as a shopper. lpo’s use cctv, floor observations, and 2-way windows to view the shoplifters in action.
d-mn, i now have a misdemeanor on my record for life, because that d-mn loss prevention officer arrested me over some dice!
the most awesome job in the world. an lpo typically spends two shifts of four hours a day walking around a high-end retail store, like target, to spot shoplifters in the act and recover stolen merchandise.
f-ck man, i got arrested for shoplifting because of target’s new loss prevention officer.
a professional, human resources, or politically correct version of a term used to refer to a security guard or rent-a-cop for a retail or department store.
“i just got hired to be target’s new loss prevention officer!”
“you know that’s just a security guard position right?”
“f-ck! i thought it was a real job.”
an inaudible slurring style of speech which is often accredited to having drank one too many. paul: last night, after mark had one too many coronitas, he was talking all mumbly-b-mbly for the entire ride home… john: wow, what a lightweight…
a give-it-or-take-it att-tude regarding mumford & sons. “did you hear? mumford & sons tickets are on sale next tuesday.” the mumbivalent response: “meh.”
- smoking the sausage
during -n-l s-x, when the receiver farts on the giver’s p-n-s and lights it, resulting in a full-bodied charred flavor. this dumb b-tch was smoking the sausage last night, so i set her hair on fire. when a person sucks a animals c-ck. laura smoked baily’s sausage last night.
derived from the word smother; to smudder means when a man or woman simply smothers or overwhelms someone they are s-xually interested in. calling too much, flirting too much, saying i love you every ten minutes, excessive s-xting, texting usually does not wear good perfume or cologne. essentially developing an obessesion with someone who is […]
- White Unicorn
1. a mythical creature a that only exists in fairy tales and p-rn. 2. a squirter 3. a female who has the ability to spray a ton of liquid out of her v-g-n- and it is not urine. 4. sometimes will preface telling you about her special ability by asking if you like dogs. 1. […]