Mortar and Pestle


when your old lady jabs the wound with a phallic object furiously, with such emotional intensity not achieved by another activity.
what did you do last night?

oh my plans got cancelled so i just whipped out the old mortar and pestle and went to town.

Read Also:

  • mortar

    to “sit on a mortar” is to suffer the consequences of a ‘dirty bomb’ detonation. “unfortunately your highness, my husband had some dodgy prawn chimichongas for lunch and has sat on a mortar, thus he will not be able to attend tea.” an early type of one-or-two-man artillery that could be easily moved from place […]

  • Sphinctitus

    lower abdominal distress accompanied by very odiferous flatulence, with or without -ssachino. commonly following a spicy or greasy meal. people in the office were angry at nick when he developed sphinct-tus after his bean burrito for lunch.

  • sphinkle

    the act of artfully bedazzling your sphincter. similar to -ssjazzling, but with more sparkle. ironically popular in san francisco, where the combination of a mission-style burrito, a fresh sphinkle job and a long walk up a steep hill may result in a dangerous form of internal combustion. tristan: you seem different today, jill. you have […]

  • sphinxter

    sphinxter – an amateur egyptologist who cannot tell his -ss from a hole in the ground. alternate definition: an outhouse for illiterate western tourists (locally referred to as “sphinxters”) located at the sphinx in egypt. this sphinxter was loudly wandering all around cairo looking for a bathroom but only found an outhouse near the sphinx […]

  • Willybumskin

    the perky bit of skin between the b-mhole and b-llsack. often hairy, often bald (shaved) also known as ‘the gooch’ just fiddling with my w-llyb-mskin mate


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