Teenage Girl

the teenage girl is possibly the absolute stupidest, most materialistic, and shallow kind of human there is, and by definition the easiest to make money off of.

the average teenage girl wears a general uniform that includes leggings, uggs, northface jackets, (with some variation in color) in winter (at least last year, every year the fashion changes slightly), on halloween extremely whorish costumes (police, nurse, cheerleader, teacher etc), and in summer extremely tiny shorts and skirts with sungl-sses wide enough to hide her entire face. of course all of these outfits must come from a wide variety of different brands which also provide a wide variety of accessories that she clearly dont need.

teenage girls tend to travel in herds of 5 or 6 as they have nothing resembling independent thought or character and are totally subservient to the ‘alpha’ who decides who they can sleep with or date, what they eat, where they go, what they wear, and what they do (see mean girls).

in her free time the average teenage girl likes to listen to m-ss produced idiotic music by the likes of miley cyrus/ hannah montana, the jonas brothers, taylor swift, britney spears and others, in groups this is usually accompanied by screaming of the lyrics very obnoxiously to make sure everybody knows what idiots they are. if she is literate she usually turn to twilight, the product of a brilliant mormon woman who managed to take every love story ever told, put it in a blender, and pour it out onto paper to sell to this particular group, the average teenage girl will often complain that boys in real life cannot compare to the characters in the story between bursts of tears. her favorite television programs include gossip girl, the oc, and other teen dramas, as she cannot cause enough drama in real life she needs heavy doses of artificial drama to satisfy her egos and inspire her on how to ruin the lives of her peers. movies include the ‘romantic comedy’ or chick flick genre, very poorly written stories of two people falling in love one way or another. in short, any idiot with basic writing skills could make a killing selling these girls absolute sh-t.

the average teenage girl is of very low intelligence. she talks in a very high pitched voice interjected any conversation with copious ‘like’s and ‘um’s (see legally blonde) and can never seem to get her ideas straight.. if a male really wants to get some action all he has to do is date one of these girls because soon enough all her best friends will be trying to sleep with him, the average teenage girl has no value for loyalty and true friendship and constantly tries to backstab anyone she perceives as a ‘bffl’.

the average teenage girl craves attention. period. at parties frequently one will find some of these girls partaking in pseudo lesbian kissing, some will be crying over some ex boyfriend or some other idiocy, some will get too drunk and too loud, some will cause drama by fighting with a friend or openly cheating on their boyfriends in front of everybody. the goal of the teenage girl is always to be the center of attention at all costs.

now not all teenage girls are like this, some are fully functioning intelligent young women who (and i have shown them what i have written) agree that a large portion of their age group fit this definition. frankly the above described girls are idiots and probably will amount to nothing more than trophy wives, models, or actresses in really bad movies, -ssuming they remember how to breathe
“julia stay away from that guy, i dont like him and i dont care what you think”
“ok sally, want to go get the boys to buy us manicures, go shopping, check out the taylor swift concert, and then b-tch about how boys suck”
“we’re teenage girls, what else would we do? xoxo”
the lowest form of human being on the planet. these are often shallow, pathetic creatures, attempting to be unique and special by acting “random” and claiming to be insane or to having voices inside their heads. they generally shop at abercrombie, hollister, hot topic, or vintage stores in order to appear trendy or cool.

on the internet, they often type “lyk thisss xox <#!!1" and are deeply defensive if anybody dares to disagree with their usually incorrect and flawed logic, which usually consists of another person not being allowed to voice their opinion if their achievments are not close to theirs, even though they are usually talentless and ignorant. they fail to listen to another person's points, even if stated in an organized and consistent fashion. they act as if they have roamed the internet and are completely aware of everything at the same time as being attractive, popular, and intelligent, which they are not. the teenage girl's vocabulary is very small and not very complex. their most used words are "awesome, amazing, rawr, dinosaur, random, cheese, lyke, like, bows," and "unicorns." most of the words are used to be random or original, though nearly everybody uses these words. in a quick summary, these are usually stupid, unoriginal, shallow, and self-centered creatures. some teenage girls break the mold and are extremely smart, unique, and rather clever, but these are rare. the teenage girl was verbally -ssaulted on omegle, but kept attempting to counter by saying she was kewler, pretty, unique, original, speshul, hardcore, talented, smart, and popular. she was laughed at and promptly brought to tears. a shallow, annoying, selfish, pathetic being whose intelligence is nearly sub-human. these creatures typically dress like total sl-ts, then get angry if that earns them undesired attention from boys even though the way they dress makes it appear as though they are totally asking for it. they are known to be extremely dramatic when it is really not necessary, they also tend to make it extremely difficult to solve a social conflict when it should be as simple as an apology, but no. they have to make it 100 times more complicated than it has to be. some typically cannot shut up about certain things that they are fans of. some will blame guys for their problems, or will blame guys for adding to their problems as if teen boys have to go through absolutely nothing difficult throughout their teenage life, but trust me, they do (for instance, putting up with teenage girls!). they feel the need to conform to certain social "norms" and will consent to any amount of objectification as long as it makes them popular. i could go on and on about their flaws, but that would take me all day. now, i must admit, not all teenage girls are like this. there are some that are actually quite smart, funny, and overall enjoyable to be around. however, these teenage girls are getting increasingly rare. another sad thing is, most teen girls who read this will think that they fit into the variety that are smart, funny, etc. when really, they most likely don't. if you're a high school student, just look around you and you'll see plenty of examples of teenage girls who are like this. the worst f-cking drivers in the world guy 1: holy sh-t! look at that b-tch swerve all over the road! is that a soccer mom on crack? guy 2: nope. it's just a couple teenage girls on their cell phones. theyre all emotional...and moodswingy...and annoying! but ho hum... teenage girls week: monday: i love you so much babe!!xxxxx wednesday: your sucha b-tch-keep away from me!! friday: im sorry-can we be friends? xxxxxxxxxxxxxx sunday: get out of my life you £!?& !!! a euphamism for tea - usually used in impolite/private places where mentioning tea itself would be seen as stuffy and/or nerdlike. often employed as a coverup for a sentence already begun. i really fancy some tea... nage girls right now. no thanks larry, i don't want any crack cocaine i'd much rather have some hot, black, steamy, tea... nage girls. none of your 'coffee' for me thanks, i'm english - we prefer to devour, sweet, sweet teenage girls over here. the teen-age girl is often droven to dating a popular guy just becuse he does sports. often this boy is what they would call "popular". often these guys treat them like sh-t and ignore the guys that are actaully nice and care about people. and yet these guys always win and the nice guy finishes last. the only way to get a girl to notice you is to treat them like sh-t and play hockey. "guy: hey ill let you suck my d-ck for a dollar" "teen-age girl: what?" "guy: f-ck you b-tch i do enough tripple a hockey to kill you b-tch!" "teen-age girls: :i love you!" "nice guy: hey how are you?" "teen-age girl: yeah yeah fine" "nice guy: hey do you want to go to a movie with me? i want to get to know you better." "teen-age girl: ewwwww no" -teen-age girl runs activate javascript