99 red balloons
only the best song ever
originally performed by nen
-rerecorded by goldfinger
i like rocking out to 99 red balloons
an adjective acting as a noun that describes a person in possession of pretty much every kind of std. these include but are not limited to: bacterial vaginosis, chancroid, donovanosis, gonorrhea, lymphogranuloma venereum, non-gonococchal urethritis, staph infection, syphilis, tinea cruris, yeast infection, adenovirus, viral hepat-tis a b c d and e, herpes simplex, hiv/aids, htlv 1 and 2, genital warts, cervical cancer, -n-l cancer, mollusc-m contagiosum, mononucleosis, kaposi’s sarcoma, crabs, scabies, and trich-m-niasis.
alex: hot d-mn bro…see that jailbait? i’d love to tap that.
micah: don’t be such a dumb-ss, she definitely has 99 red balloons.
alex: true. i wouldn’t want my crabs to get herpes.
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