Australian Hermit

an ausralian hermit is usually found on the beaches of the goldcoast as it is a prime spot , there is lots of crabs for snacks and plenty of friendly tourists with money. a hermit is just a formal name for a hobo. there are a few different types of hermits which are found in australia. the first is the real hermit they live on the beach , eat sand and crabs , wear fur clothes and use special facial cream which we call doggy doo doo. these types of hermits are also rewarded with ghost drops and the odd coin from local children. the second type of hermit is the trendy hermit. the trendy hermit lives in paddington and surry hills. they own sports cars and drink chai lattes. they are often seen around trendy streets , with their trendy clothes and their trendy uni-student friends. they also drink lattes except for one hermit called chi chi who drinks ice coffee. the last type of hermit which lives in australia is the self denying hermit. self denying hermits deny completely that they are hermits even though they have hermit beards and act like hermits. self denying hermits also have lady friends. as you can see australian hermits can differ.
examples of different types of australia hermits

-boy speaks to self denying australian hermit

boy-do you like mcdonalds?

hermit- me love mcdonalds , especially the dumpsters out back , they are very tasty

boy- what? that sounds like hermit talk

hermit- actually me no eat out of dumpsters , too hermit for me , like me said me real man.

boy- thats more like it

-girl speaks to city australian hermit

girl- what are you doing?

hermit- me standing infront of building and me dressed up as elvis so me can dance for coins

girl- why would you need coins

hermit- so me can buy food at best shop , corner store. me buy gummy lollie because me have no teeth.

girl- whats in that bag

hermit- me stuff , me keep me stuff in this bag so me enemy hermit wont steal me stuff while me sleep.

girl- i see

hermit- you should see unless you blind. ( cracks up laughing)

girl runs off scared for her safety.

-boy talks to a bogan australian hermit

hemit- you race me in a shopping trolley race. me shopping trolley fastest trolley in area. me win everytime

boy- ummm…

hermit- me get shopping trolley from me dad. me drive shopping trolley to work

boy- ok… where do you work?

hermit- maccas with me boyzz.

boy- maccas? you mean mcdonalds

hermit- that the one! me get good money at me job