barlowing

verb.
1. the act of shafting people in the queue without seeming like a total tw-t when the bartender forgets that you’re at the back of the queue and asks you what you want. this is done by turning to one of the people next to you and saying “this person was here before me.” to the bartender thus shafting everybody else and looking like a saint to the bartender and the person next to you. this is called barlowing because it is the moral equivalent of making a song for charity and performing tax evasion.
2. a manoeuvre that allows you to get to the front of a bar queue when one of the people in front of you leave and the person next to you is also contending to get that sp-ce. this is done by preventing the leaving man from turning to face you and can be performed in this step by step procedure:
step 1: form a barrier between the leaver and the bar’s exit. this is commonly done by putting your hand on the bar while facing the leaver. this will cause him to turn the other way.
step 2: if the leaver turns too far away, the “opponent” will still have a decent chance of getting that sp-ce. this can be prevented by putting your other hand on the bar, and then sliding in when the leaver starts to leave.

this is called barlowing because while it is usually considered rude to turn your back on somebody, you’ll be thinking “i want your back for good.”
1. “wow dave, that was very kind of you to let that man go first” “actually nick, i was barlowing the queue. i was 9th when i arrived, but i skipped to 2nd!”
2. while dave was usually a moral person, he occasionally liked to practise barlowing in pubs. he didn’t feel any guilt if the person next to him was a notefold c-ck.