Blender Magazine

blender magazine

(1) a magazine in a blender

(2) the leaders of decling and idiocy literature.

(3) the worst magazine you can read. if you follow, believe, agree, and read blender, do not hope that you will become successful.

(4) stupid literature

blender magazine is one of the worst magazines. they show their stupidty by placing top 100 best and worst. sometimes from the best and worst bands to who pees the best/worst.

blender has attacked some greats, good, and ok bands as being worst the bands or worst lyricist. they named the legendary group the doors as one of the worst bands and jim morrison as one of the worst writers. they used an example of “ramble on” by the led zeppelin as horrible writing. however, blender magazine has named the horrible “black parade” alb-m as the best and puts stupid people like avril lavigne on the magazine covers. how can you say those bands are the worst if they are clearly idiots and avoided saying bands fall out boy, good charlotte, all american rejects, 30 seconds to mars were one of the worst. that is an example of how bad and avoidable this magazine should.

the people at blender magazine deserve a 1000 deaths and tortures. these deaths
icp: they call us the worst so that’s why most of the guys at blender have a hachet through their head.

guy: blender magazine sucks!
jim: what are you doing?
bob: blender magazine (1)

rocker with a great rock band: they may name me the worst artist, but i pee on their magazine.

blender magazine(2): that’s it my children keep reading it! ha ha ha ha

hobo with a shotgun: you better have sucked your last c-ck!

blender magazine(2): ohh, i hate you

hobo with a shotgun: -shoots they guy from blender in the face and groin-

guy: what are you reading?

kid: blender magazine (3)

guy: if i were you, i throw it in the trash or blended.

kid: -kid looks at the cover- ya, you’re right, this magazine is horrible.

smart girl: what the h-ll am i reading?

friend: oh a blender magazine (4)

smart girl: oh yeah! thanks!
a music magazine whose writing staff, not content that review journalism was already a stupefyingly conceited craft, decided to create the laziest, most inconsequential rag known to literature, t-ts and all. each issue is compiled by randomly picking entries from an encyclopedia of popular music and choosing (usually by means of coin-flipping) which ones to p-ss all over and which ones to heap barely qualified praise upon in their otherwise arbitrary best/worst lists. the content is then peppered with pictures of the p-ssy cat dolls, tila tequila, or similar airbrushed w-nk-fodder and hey presto, let’s rock ‘n’ roll!!!
the t-tle is derived from the magazine’s layout having the appearance of the end result of throwing rolling stone, playboy and mad! magazine into a food processor.
band frontman: hey guys, we just got panned/lauded in blender magazine.

(nothing happens)