Body Poker
a card game invented by beatrice middleton. mostly played over the phone, but can also be played with cards. two decks of cards are needed for this game. played much like normal poker except using the parts of the body instead of chips to make bets with. whoever has the most ‘body’ at the end of the game wins. so, next time you’re looking for some fun – get a bunch of your granny friends together and play some body poker. you will love it! beatrice middleton approved!!
beatrice: hey flo, you up for a game tonight? what do you think, maybe body poker?
flo: (whooping!) bring it on, beatrice! bring it on! two body draw, kidneys wild!
(a knock at the door)
hec: hey girls, what’s going on? whoah, do i smell body poker going on? deal me in, grannies!
flo: okay, you’re up. i’ll be you two kidneys against one heart.
beatrice: i’ll see your bet and raise you some spider veins! my blue babies!
hec: (growling) well, throw in an arthritic knee and its a deal!
(laughing from the next room)
morris: (talking to midge) what are they doing in there? are they doing that body poker stuff again?
midge: sure, they love to play it. you know, when you get old your body falls apart.
morrs: well, maybe they should deal me up. i’ll go ask them.
hec: (hearing morris from the other room) sure! i’ll raise you a stiff back. you’re in!
(everyone starts laughing)
beatrice: pay up, sonny! i’ll raise you a whole body for just your back!
morris: rock on, body poker is the newest blackjack!
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