bogan

an extremely dumb, racist and rude specimen found in parts of rural australia. they are a waste of air and should be disposed of properly if found.
“did you hear about the bogan on the train last night????”
“yeah he was p-ssed and was yelling racial slurs at a black man”
a fascinating beast. the majority of the species are hideously repugnant and unintelligent, and yet they manage to breed in ever-increasing numbers and populate an area known as the outer west. it is quite common to find five or six offspring in each family group, often with a different father for each new baby.
their habitat consists of a weatherboard or brick-veneer dwelling and is characterised by an early-model holden or ford in the driveway surrounded by a group of males discussing why the carby is stuffed and the results of last night’s footy (a primitive gladiator-like spectator sport enjoyed by most bogans).
the female of the species, while smaller in stature, is far more loud and aggressive than the male. while the males tend to be very friendly and congregate with other males, the females spend most of their time in supermarkets and shopping malls, using a shrill high-pitched call to discipline their children and contact other females.
males and females rarely interact socially except during breeding season, which is otherwise known as friday night. during this time, females are allowed to enter the male-dominated area known as “the pub” and display their impressive coloured plumage to a prospective mate.
herein lies an intersting phenomenon. males will often fight over a particularly attractive female and she will mate with only one male, while some less attractive females have been known to have several partners simultaneously.

ahhhh. the wonders of nature.
chris franklin, eric bana as “poita” on fast forward, most of campbelltown.
in tasmania, australia there are 2 breeds of bogans, theres the typical male “aussie” style bogan: who wears “wife basher” shirts (singlet tops) with many torn holes, tight stone wash jeans or some other pants, usually either wearing one or tied around the waist or slung over there shoulder a flanelette (flannie) shirt or holden/ford tops, and a pair of old blundstone boots (blunnies) and usually drives and old holden commodore or ford falcon. and swear the faces off, usually every second word is f–k. and are commonly seen with a can of vb in there hand.
then theres the 2nd type usually teens who are seen decked out in dada, wutang, fox racing, eminem plastic cr-p, and the baggy wutang, fubu, emineme brand etc jeans and usually topped off with a cap of some kind, thinking that they’re so d-mn cool but they’re not. the female version is jeans that are so tight like you would not believe, have their hair pulled back and slicked down with a whole tub of gel except for 2 front bits which are pulled out and are the same length as the rest of their hair (commonly called “bogan bits”) and wear dada, wutang, fubu, fox racing etc, jumpers 10 times too big for them and wear whole stick of eye liner on each eye and way too much foundation and are seen pushing prams around followed by a colony of young children (all to differnt fathers)
my god there is so many bogans around hobart! it’s like bogan central or something!
or
nah, not going there to many scary bogans around!
an australia who usually goes by the name of gaz, darryn, bazza or something similar, with a keen eye for holdens, fords and pannel vans. they are usually found sporting a fannellette shirt, tight, black ripped jeans, moccissons or ugh boots and ac/dc merchandise. the drink vb and are fans of rock music which may be heard blasting out their car windows as they “cruise” around the neighbour hood late at night.
“oi shiela”
“wadda ya want baz?”
“get us a packet of smokes and a nuva vb from the fridge luv.”
lets get this straight, bogans are australia wide they are in every nook and cranny, and we love them because we can take the p-ss. sure the women bogan has 6 kids to 6 different fathers, loves her alcohol and ciggies, has a different fashion sense, swears like a trooper, and is a general embar-ssment at the supermarket but at least we can look on and have bit of a laugh. as for the bloke well he loves his vb, ciggies/dope, flannie, mullet, beanie, holden or ford top, holden or ford car, has an excellent grasp on the english vocabluary, and has possible missing teeth, but who is going to look at him sideways when he’s at the pub or he wants that car spot you want?
they are a national treasure and we should be proud, for our taxes pay for their everything.
person 1: have a look at this bloke
person 2: what a bogan!
a lower cl-ss inhabitant, usually of south-eastern australia. generally ‘dim-witted’, bogans are well know for having poor and vulgar language and typically found in rural areas or outer, lower cl-ss, suburbs. a male bogan can often be seen wearing old attire typically a ‘wife-beater’ (singlet), australian rules football jumper, or a flanel shirt. hair cuts are typical of those seen in the 80’s/90’s with a common style being the ‘mullet’. a male bogan’s intrests are in the australian style ‘ute’ (utility vehicle), australian rules football, and the consumption of beer. the female bogan typically wears tight pants and with attire typical of the 80’s/90’s. often refered to as ‘darl’ and ‘sheila’ the female bogan often attracts the attention of fellow bogans by calling an abbreviation of their name in a high pitched shril. the male bogan holds the postion of authority in a bogan household that can often see as many as 5 or 7 children. the female bogan is called upon by the male bogan only for dinner, beer and intercourse.
chigwell is full of bogans
a doyen of australian culture, similar to the american “redneck”. easily spotted due to penchant for sporting mullet haircuts, wearing black jeans and flannel shirts, and driving big old cars such as valiants, falcons or h-series holdens while listening to ac/dc or metallica.
“you’d better get a haircut soon, you’re starting to look like a bogan!”
australian or new zealander who possesses no cl-ss at all

refer: white trash, red-neck, trailer trash, alcoholic, breeder, simpleton, victorian, geelong, prahran, shepparton
the traditional bogan:

identification key for the male of the species:
black desert boots, tight black jeans, blue singlet or black t-shirt (ac-dc etc), blue chequered flannelette (flanny) long sleeved shirt.
mullet haircut (short at the front, long at the back – refer: billy ray cyrus the haircut with its own motto: ‘business at the front, party at the back’ in some circles also referred to as: ‘party at the back, business at the front’ either way it is still a sh-t haircut.
smokes ‘winfield blues’, these are generally located rolled up in the sleeve of the ‘flanny’
drinks victoria bitter (vb)
drives a generally loud v8 holden or ford with a stupid sticker on the back taking the p-ss out of the make of car that they do not drive; or simply stating the make/model of car that they do drive, just in case they forget.

identification key for the female of the species:
loud wh-r- with way too many snotty brats, horrible shrill voice, shocking accent, really stupid (no -n-logy available), shops at safeway, also possesses all of the traits of the male of the species.

social activities include: going down the pub, drinking, arguing, violence, breeding, prejudice of all varieties, watching the footy, watching big brother, watching greys anatomy, watching today tonight and a current affair to see what their relatives are up to, watching the cricket, ten-pin bowling, doing burnouts and bog laps (bogan laps = driving around town just because), filling the front yard up with cars thereby further devaluing the neighbourhood, bbq’s and referring to everyone else as bogans (no i am not a bogan; don’t be a smart–rs- lol)

the contemporary bogan:

white trash with a severe american influence on their language, social skills and lack of fashion sense.

friday 26/12/2008

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