bouncer

the big fat guy standing in front of the doorway of stripclubs and keeps everyone out if they are not on the “list”. this “list” is basically what the bouncer -ssumes who you are, if your a hobo, hes not letting you in. he doesn’t want any trouble, but if you hit him, he has every right to pummel you to mush.

they also guard doorways to celebrity parties. in those rich guy parties, bouncers are controlled by a wienie-boy butler who talks in a squeaky voice, but commands all the power as long as the big guys are getting paid. these types of rich guy bouncers are less round and more built, and can easily throw you out of a bulletproof window, but can’t overturn cars.
the bouncer’s weight makes it a danger itself, and he isn’t watching where hes stepping either.
a bouncer is the first face you see when entering a bar, pub, or night club, and how they treat you often sets the mood for the night. they make sure everyone who enters the establishment is of legal drinking age, not overly intoxicated, dressed according the the bars dresscode, not carying any weapons or drugs. they tend to be large and muscular. their job is to make sure that the bar is safe for the customers and bar staff alike. the bouncers duties inside the bar are to eject overly drunk people and trouble makers, and to prevent and break up fights, make sure people pay for their drinks. if you treat a bouncer with respect, most will act in kind. if you act like an -sshole, chances are you will wake up in an ally in a pool of your own blood with serious head trauma.
“i called the bouncer a p-ssy, that was the last time i saw out of my right eye”
“i gave the bouncer at the door a fifty and he let me and my friends in right away, without cover charge too!”
“that bouncer saved my -ss from getting jumped, i’m gonna buy him some drinks for after he gets off work”
thugs and/or bodyguards positioned outside a dance club to protect that dancers and kick out any who don’t belong.
whoa dude, those bouncers look like they could kick our -sses
the big guy outside of pubs and nightclubs. some of these men are usually pretty nice people, unforturnately most of them are not.

most bouncers or doormen are actually lacking in brain cells, and only got through life by being big and “hard” (able to beat someone up without much harm to themselves). sometimes the bouncer or doorman will willingly abuse their position and actually throw someone out who is neither too drunk, nor causing any trouble, simply for the sake of it. i -ssume it’s because they just need to look they’re actually doing something, and not just standing around talking.

if the person resists, they will force them out. they generally dislike people who actually have some pride and attack them with words and intelligence rather than fists.

they generally live by their own rules, and ignore the law. if a bouncer beats up a person he has thrown out because he has been resisting, even if the person had a right to resist, the bouncer will not be charged with -ssault, and the person he beat up will spend the night in jail.
a merry guy walks past the door minding his own business, perhaps he’s looking for someone;

bouncer: you’re too drunk, get out.
the guy: what? i’m fine…
bouncer: no you’re not, you’re coming with me.

the bouncer grabs the guy by the arms

the guy: what are you doing? let go of me.

the guy shrugs the bouncers hands off. the bouncer then takes that as an excuse to grab him harder and push him out the door.

the next hour consists of the guy arguing with bouncer over, whilst getting more and more p-ssed off. until the guy realises there’s no point and goes home, thinking to return the next day to complain. except even if he did complain nothing would happen, and the bouncer would just lie and say the guy was kicking off before he was grabbed.
a strong man hired to eject people from a bar or other similar place(supposedly, a person bounces when thrown out.)
that bouncer looked as if he could rip a tree right out of the ground.
typically a knuckle dragging, low foreheaded baboon that has bad manners and is rude to patrons trying to get enter an establishment that serves alcohol. impossible to talk to or reason with, think they are above everyone else and can ruin a good night out when you haven’t done anything to justify either being not let in to a pub/bar/nightclub or ejected from one.
bill: how come that bouncer wouldn’t let you in?

ben: no idea, i showed him my id and i hadn’t been drinking. they’re all unreasonable pr-cks with iq’s below 10.

ben: wow, what a n-b, i can’t think of any bouncer i’ve encountered that hasn’t been a complete d-ckhead, unlucky mate.

n. – nice, large shapely br–sts that jiggle and bounce a lot. they are also fun to play with and stick you c-ck between.
she has a nice pair of bouncers

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