Cargo Fucker

a cargo f-cker is a shipping company or freight forwarder that does not understand that their business purpose is to serve customers in getting their cargo from a to b in an efficient and effective manner. typical symptoms you might observe when getting in touch with cargo f-ckers are:
– cargo f-cker refuses to pick up the goods from your storage provider
– cargo f-cker does not understand inco terms
– cargo f-cker has no clue what import regulations and customs forms are
– cargo f-cker is unavailable or unable to answer questions such as estimated time of arrival
– cargo f-cker promises a delivery date, but will realize he made a mistake and tell the warehouse to inform you about a different delivery date which coincidently overlaps with your 4-week business trip
– cargo f-cker delivers to a location that is different to the location that had been agreed in the contract
– cargo f-cker causes additional costs but does not feel responsible to cover them
– cargo f-cker damages your cargo so that it literally looks “f-cked” (similar to the “american pie” in the movie)

the best remedy against a cargo f-cker is to doc-ment all symptoms you experience, post it on social media to prevent others from getting infected with cargo f-ckery, and notify the local regulatory body
me client: emma, what is the estimated arrival time of my shipment in san francisco?
emma cargo f-cker: the goods will arrive in san francisco on march 31st
susie warehouse: your goods arrived at our warehouse in san leandro on april 12th. the free storage period is over. you owe us $400 or we will discard your 13 boxes
me client: what the f-ck? d-mn it, emma was a cargo f-cker!
emma cargo f-cker: -moan- your boxes really turned me on. i was soooooo h-rny. i had to f-ck them -moan-