chainis

among the most versatile words in the history of all languages, the word ‘chainis’, as some like to enunciate it, is a word applicable in all contexts and situations, taking on a plethora of meanings from the soft grace of a rose petal as it gently lays to rest in a calm, summer pond to being a complete dumb-ss. it is often aptly altered with prefixes, post-fixes and other common grammatical constructions to suit the general mood being felt by a group of individuals. it is believed by traditionalists that embedded within every soul, is the desire to utter such glory. the fulfillment felt by one who recites it at the appropriate time is distinct and available only to those of refined taste. contrary to popular opinion, chainis is not the equivalent to ‘chinese’ (an asian nationality and culture) and any such attempt to -ssert this is offensive, ignorant and met with contempt.
friend: “hey man, are you going to paintball this weekend?”
gentleman: “chainis ;)”
friend: “…is that a yes or a no?”

barista: “h-llo sir, would you like cream or sugar in your coffee today?”
gentleman: “chainis ;)”
barista: “you again!?! security!”

priest: “do you take her as your lawfully wedded wife?”
gentleman: “chainis”
priest: “wow, just wow, i’m so done with this sh-t.”
-flips over table holding wedding cake and leaves-
fiancee: “you’ve ruined everything! i hate you!”
-starts crying and storms off-

man of lesser intellect: “hey, you know its really immature and unbecoming of you to keep using that silly word.”
gentleman: “shut up, you chainis.”
man of lesser intellect: “getting real tired of your sh-t…”

psychotherapist: “so tell me, when did you first start using this word, what was it… chainis?”
gentleman: “don’t try that simplified chainis bullsh-t with me, all you’ll get is a plate full of chainis with side order of chainis and also, chainis”
psychotherapist: -writes in notepad- “needs extensive treatment, possibly electroshock therapy with several rounds of psychoactive medication”

priest: “does anybody wish to say any last words before we lower his body into the ground?”
resentful spirit: “yeah, why don’t you go chainis yourself, you post-chainis chainiser”
resentful spirit 2: “n-gg-, you owe me rent!”