Cock Off

the act of replying to an unwanted picture of a p-n-s with a picture of a bigger p-n-s.
i’m having a c-ck off with some creep who said ‘hi s-xy’ and sent me a picture of his d-ck.
coigned by bubba the love sponge: when two males that cannot settle an argument or dispute in any other civilized fashion resort to measuring their genitals to determine a winner. the standard form is to lay your junk on a table about yea high while your opponent does the same from the opposite side. the match is immediately forfeit if you attempt to touch your opponent while he is in this position.
bubba and ronny had an dispute that they couldn’t settle. bubba challenged ronny to a c-ck off. when they measured their c-cks, it was determined tht bubba’s c-ck was longer….he was then named the winner of the c-ck off and the argument. …and there was much rejoicing
when a bunch of questionable dudes each take a paper plate, go upstairs, cut a hole in said plate, work one up, put their respective c-cks in said holes, go back downstairs, and present before an appropriate panel of judges (panel is made up of fellow dudes, not gals).

c-ckoffs can also take place in a dudes backyard….perhaps at some sort of celebratory cook-out.
weasel: blake……i guarantee i have a larger c-ck than you.

blake: with utmost heartfelt respect, i disagree.

weasel: why don’t we c-ckoff then?

blake: i’ll go get the brand new ream of plates i just bought.
an event much like a duel, where two men unable to come to terms by conventional methods such as talking or fighting, stand back to back, walk 10 paces, turn and drop their pants. the man with the largest c-ck wins, and the loser must hang his head in shame and leave.
obviously talking or even fighting wouldn’t have settled the argument so i challenged him to a c-ck-off. i won.
functions in the same way as ‘f-ck off’ or some other expletive which expresses disdain at another or a desire for them to leave/stop talking/stop messing around.
colin: “you know, nadine, some people think that buildings like my garden shed are actually rather attractive.”

nadine : “c-ck off, colin.”
two men use the barometer of manhood to win a duel relating to who has the strongest masculinity.
a win can be attained without the need for a showdown (similar to poker)
two geezers in a pub toilet. a clubber and a long haired iron maiden man. a c-ck-off ensues.

clubber: “feeling insecure there m8?”
mr. iron maiden man(slightly confused look): “a-nope”
small pause.
clubber: “you should be”
mr. iron maiden man(slightly annoyed & definitely agitated): “yeh – any time you want mate – bring it on”
clubber finishes and leaves, iron maiden man wins.
the act of berating, swearing at, and/or accusing of lower deeds, or otherwise offending a person of higher political standing without cause.
“don’t c-ck-off to me!”

“if you c-ck-off to me again, i’ll mess you up!”

“c-cking-off to a cop will only land you in jail.”
repeated attempts by two or more males to prove which one is bigger or better than the other in any given way. this can be anything from terse email arguments to a refusal to get of a gym exercise bike until the person next to you has.
hey buster, did you see that email c-ck off between russell and ken… man russell missed all the points completely, he really is a one incher.

←