commercial violator
a commercial violator is a person who has a flagrant disregard for the unwritten laws of tv commercials. to elaborate, the general rule is that when you are watching tv with others and a commercial comes on, you are free to tell whatever idiotic story you like, but when the commercial break ends, the story must be completely finished.
a commercial violator tends to have an endless supply of cr-ppy stories about how their day went. this person does not sit down with the group with the intent of watching tv, but rather conveying some sort of story to the group. as the commercial violator begins their story, the keeper of the remote turns down the volume of the tv to be courteous. the situation quickly goes awry as soon as the commercial is over and the end of the story is nowhere in site.
one must avoid watching tv with commercial violators at all cost. however, if you find yourself in posession of the remote and a commercial violator’s story is exceeding its alloted time, it is adviseable that you very discreetly turn up the volume on the television set until he/she stops.
person a: yeah so i was trying to watch mythbusters the other day and my mom was being a total commercial violator. she was telling some cr-ppy story about something funny she saw on c-span.
person b: g-d d-mnit. how was the situation resolved?
person a: it wasn’t, she finished her story and i missed half the f-cking show. i did not get my kari byron dose of the week.
person b: not cool!
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