Conspiracy Theory

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18 more definitions
1) designation -ssigned by corporate media to any idea divergent of government script.

2) results from careful and unbiased -n-lysis of the facts and circ-mstances surrounding a high profile event, proving an agenda is/was in motion.

3) so called ‘conspiracy theorists’ preferred to be called ‘agenda -n-lysts’ or simply thinkers.
>>friendly neighbor<<: i’m 99% sure your house is on fire. you should leave. >>home owner<<: leave? if i don’t marinate in the glow of my tv for at least six hours every night, i have no chance at happiness. so no, you leave. get the h-ll out of here! >>neighbor<<: please sir, there are flames shooting out from all your windows and a dark cloud of smoke halos your house, which clearly and strongly suggests your house is on fire and your family should evacuate. >>owner<<: no. no. i can’t believe that so you must be wrong. to settle this i will call the mainstream media to verify. >>neighbor<<: sir, seeing has to be believing. i beg you to please just look at the evidence and decide for yourself. your family is in danger. >>owner<<: hold on, i’m on the phone. - yes, h-llo kind s-xy professional expert media personality. my neighbor claims my house is on fire. i think he is being too negative. >>media personality<<: ok, calm down. one question. is your house a steel frame structure? >>owner<<: no, just wood and insulation. >>media<<: well then, you have nothing to fear. fire doesn’t melt wood, it only melts steel and concrete, like on 9-11. lumber igniting is just some wild conspiracy theory. you are smart to distrust your neighbors and loved ones. he’s probably trying to rob you. just get back to watching your ‘i love lucy’ reruns and buy the advertised products. (hangs up) >>owner<<: look a-hole, you need to be more positive. stop being a nutbag. there is no such thing as a house fire. (slams door, fire collapses house neatly into its own footprint at the speed of gravity killing him and his entire family) --- “let us never tolerate outrageous conspiracy theories regarding the attacks of september 11” - president george w. bush, at the 56th session of the united nations general -ssembly, november 10, 2001, new york two words which are uttered whenever anyone is getting too close to the truth this renders said person null and void and gives said person the appearance of a paranoid tw-t with a tinfoil hat regardless of what facts or evidence or actual proof they have these two little words conspiracy theory have a magical effect similar to: "there is no such thing as the occult,the occult doesn't exist, you don't need to see any identification,these aren't the droids you are looking for,you can go about your business,move along" remember your history books are all true until you find something in them you're not supposed to talk about.then you will be rendered a paranoid schizophrenic by the utterence of the two magical words "conspiracy theory" the result long term cannabis usage has on thought process. thefoer anything that is most likely true, changes to being a cover up or having a 'hidden agenda'. usually spouted by douches on the popular video sharing site youtube. these people make their videos and then of course, the truth is uncovered. hey, its on youtube, it must be true! you know that september 11th is a conspiracy theory. thousands of hours of video recordings showing what the government want you to see, but i have found just 10 seconds that show the real truth. smoke the spliff and see! a label that can be affixed to any argument or point that one doesn't like to avoid having to provide a valid response to it. much like "that's just your opinion", "i don't actually care" and "i was joking", this card is frequently played by the debater who has been outwitted and defeated, but thinks if he doesn't directly admit it, he still might be seen as the overall winner. this remains a powerful tactic though, due to the extremely negative connotation of the term "conspiracy theory", given to it by people who think it's impossible that anyone would ever do something that's not good for us then cover it up, so insisting something is a conspiracy theory is still an alarmingly effective way of getting people to side with the person without a point, regardless of how little sense calling it a conspiracy theory actually makes. remember, labels are powerful things and can easily affect what people perceive something as actually being. (not to be confused with the more traditional meaning of the belief that a secret group would perform an extremely complicated operation that's of no benefit to anyone and somehow keep it all secret. these are usually more worthy of derision. usually.) use of it in this sense: "it's unbelievable the manufacturer used these cheaper materials in this product. i guess they'll do whatever they can to make a few more bucks." "ha, yeah, right, it's all a big conspiracy. of course." "wha-" "anyone with sense knows that corporations always do what's best for us. go write a blog and leave your conspiracy theory there, nutjob." the reason it works: "the pazzi conspiracy was an unsuccessful attempt to overthrow the medici in florence in the 15th century." "that's impossible, it has the word 'conspiracy' right in it!" "it's a well-doc-mented historical event. it's a conspiracy that actually happened, it's not like denying the moon landing." "bullsh-t, conspiracies aren't real! it's a made up thing just like unicorns and evolution!" a term debunkers use to refer to anything that is impossible for them to accept no matter what irrefutable evidence is presented. to these people the term is synonymous with fraud, lies and is even dangerous to consider other than for the purpose of debunking or to give oneself an imagined sense of superiority to those gullible enough to fall for such outrageous falsehoods. "we must speak the truth about terror. let us never tolerate outrageous conspiracy theory (ies) concerning the attacks of september the 11th, malicious lies that attempt to shift the blame away from the terrorists themselves, away from the guilty." g.w. bush speaking before the un general -ssembly 11/10/2001 a generally unsubstantiated claim - generally based on what is called an argument from ignorance, linking completely unrelated things, etc - that is usually considered to be against the well-being of the demographic of the conspiracy theorist. almost always pushed by scientifically illiterate people, religious fundamentalists, the uneducated or misinformed, and - always - the paranoid. "the government did 9/11! jews control all of the banks as part of the illuminati! nwo nwo nwo chemtrails!" "you're a moron with this conspiracy theory nonsense. the 'illuminati,' and 'nwo,' for that matter, have been conspiracy theories for well over a century. people were just as alarmist then as you nuts are now. and we're in some totalitarian unfree state now where you.. oh, have the freedom to express these nutjob hypotheses of yours?"