Crackerbones
a sub-category of crackers, this version is noticeably skinnier and enjoys parting his trim hair, wearing sweater vests, and generally following the fashion trends/fads observed at the local country club (i.e. brooks brothers, orvis, eddie bauer). usually enjoys singing in choir, wine tasting, and playing croquet or polo. likelihood of having used men’s beauty products: 95%. likelihood of having used a shovel: 0%.
largely responsible for the continued support of the “pop your collar” movement originally started by the group e-40 in the year 2000.
crackerbones wouldn’t have made it from the vineyard to his polo game in time had it not been for the timeliness and expert flying of his helicopter pilot.
after we all got mad sloshed at the bar, crackerbones paid the tab on his dad’s card and had his chauffeur drive us home.
“hey crackerbones — you planning on spending all your inheritance on your watch collection or just most of it? i know your cell phone is a gps, e-reader, browser, and camera, but did you know it’s a clock too?”
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