Derek Fisher

one of the most judicious and agile point guards ever to play in the nba. he is known for his ferocious defense, three point shooting, stealing, court vision, timing and most of all confidence. derek fisher is now in his second run with the los angeles lakers having signed a three year contract. his teammates are always quoted saying he’s one of the most chivalries gentleman off the court but an absolute tireless beast on it. derek fisher wears the jersey number #2.
dumb guy: the your teams confidence and flow has slipped a lot within the last 5 minutes of the third.
lakers fan: it’s cause derek fisher is resting. they’ll bring him in for the majority of the fourth, he’ll nail some threes, give some unbelievable -ssists and we’ll win.
dumb guy: dude, i’m so stupid. sorry.
a former la lakers player who was overlooked because he played on the same team as kobe and shaq. derek fisher had one of histories greatest buzzer beaters against the san antonio spurs with .4 seconds left to win a playoff game.
kid 1: did you see that lakers game last night? derek fisher is amazing!
kid 2: manu gin-bili got owned!
starting point guard for the los angeles lakers.

to laker fans fisher is a 5 times nba champion (rinds gifted to him by the better players around him) a great clutch shot maker in both the regular season and playoffs (due to lakers star kobe bryant being doubled at the end of close games), apparently fisher is also a leader and an excellent teammate.

to non-laker nba fans and non r-t-rds he is one frustrating old, slow, bald d-ckhead. fisher is what basketball fans call a flopper or c-cknose sh-thead as he falls or flops to the ground whenever he is guarding someone and expects to get a charge call or turnover from the nba official. in reality it is all an act as if an offensive player actually made contact with fisher, the nba veteran’s bones would shatter. david stern allows fisher to flop because derek gave stern bl-wj-bs during the nba offseason. unsurprisingly fisher has been gifted the no. 1 spot on the biggest floppers in the nba webpage by the bleacherreport which can be found via google or on their website

in addition to his flopping derek fisher has the ugliest jumpshot in the nba along with shawn marion. fisher’s shot looks like a combination of michael redd’s gun sling action and a leprechaun tap dancing around a burning rubbish bin on crack. fisher averages less than 9 points per game for his nba career and shoots at 40% from the field (that’s really, really sh-t.)
ali: “who is that lakers player falling to the ground on the basketball court?”
noz: “that is derek fisher the worst flopper in the nba”
ali: -pauses- “i hate him”
david stern: “i do too but he gives great bl-wj-bs”