douchebag herpes
douchebag herpes is a highly contagious disease in which the affected persons act like complete douchebags toward all other forms of life. like the well known herpes virus, the symptoms often lay dormant for long periods of time before surfacing. douchebag herpes is most common in attractive teenage boys when perfectly nice girls are drawn in by their charm. sometimes manifests in the form of discrete lying, but most commonly by the said infected person completely ignoring said perfectly nice girl without a just cause.
those infected with douchebag herpes can easily cure themselves by admitting their wrongdoing and apologizing, although the condition often doesn’t allow this to take place because the infected person’s head is usually way to far up his -ss to see what he’s done wrong.
dude, you have douchebag herpes? you shoulda told me. we could’ve worked through it together. but stay away from me now, man. i don’t wanna catch it.
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