Drunk octopus that wants to love you


a mystical creature that has 8 moving appendages that may look askew, but wants nothing more than to love you. likely not inebriated but sweet enough to be made of macaroons.
“so _______ and i were getting really excited one night and we started to take off each other’s clothes, that is when i realized he was a drunk octopus that wants to love you!”

girl: hey _______, come over here…

drunk octopus that wants to love you: okay… (wiggles ears…. licks lips… wiggles nose… walks over to girl, takes off her clothes… wiggles 8th appendage)

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