Ear Wank
to ear w-nk (verb) is the act of firmly inserting a finger into one’s own ear and then fairly vigorously jerking the hand up and down.
the person who is “ear w-nking themselves off” experiences an intense satisfaction; not dissimilar to, yet still distinct from, the same satisfaction experienced when scratching an unpleasant itch.
an ear w-nk (noun) comes from the verb, and describes the act of undergoing an ear w-nk.
note that it is possible in theory to ear w-nk other people off, but due to the risks involved (eg. ear wax) it is rarely practiced and not widely accepted in western society.
alex: “tom… what are you doing?”
tom: “i’m ear w-nking.”
alex: “oh. looks weird.”
tom: “yeah.”
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