FBI Agent

people who can look like 7 other people in 5 minutes and have 18 different p-ssports with 35 different names.

work for the part of government who thinks they are the smart -ss and center of the world. people usually have a love-hate relationship with them, in the sense that you get amazed by the jobs they do but also hate their sn-bby know-it-all att-tude. in movies they are the people who flash a wallet and roar “fbi!” as they chase after terrorists with legit looking guns.

favorite phrase is “that information is cl-ssified.” this phrase is also the reason why people think they are sn-bby know-it-alls.
person 1: who wear sungl-sses on a rainy day looking like they are going to the concert in that suit?
person 2: some kind of fbi agent…
a person who wears black suits and sungl-sses that investigates federal, local, or worldly matters. most of them are stiff, drive black cars, drink lots of coffee, make over $100,000 a year, wear casual designer-type clothes when not at work , travel all over the world, use lots of technology, act very secretive and quiet, and are masters of disguies.

some of them have desk jobs, while the majority work in the field. sometimes, they have to go undercover. at work they are called agents, and non-fbi agents are referred to as ‘civilians’. at home, they live regular lives, just like you and me.
girlfriend: darius, where have you been? you’ve been gone for 2 weeks now!

fbi agent: i can’t tell you that. that information is cl-ssified.

girlfriend: oh, come on!