Fort Covington
fort covington, ny – it’s a town just as redneck as it sounds. with one street light, one gas station, one grocery store and one pizzeria, there are plentiful action-packed things to do and see for the 32 people that live in this podunk town. fifty percent of the locals are above 70 years of age and have never left the town…even for a vacation. the other fifty percent are two-teethed rejects of life that spread their legs for money and live off the welfare system. yes, this place sure has its charm. well, no one comes to visit, and those who p-ss through it barely noticed. the stench of cow sh-t in the summer may have gotten a p-sserby’s attention, but for the most part – only indians make their way through fort covington, only to go to canada and smuggle huge amounts of stank weed into the country for double the price. ahh, the beautiful cow country, dirty salmon river, and m-ffin topped ladies pushing strollers of rugrats down route 37. this town is the pride of the north country, for sure.
a driver and p-ssenger are cruising down route 37 and spot a road sign for fort covington up ahead.
the car’s p-ssenger waits 5 seconds and asks if they had reached the town yet.
but the driver says to the p-ssenger, “dude, we p-ssed it four seconds ago. didn’t you see that nasty fat b-tch licking a custard outside of leroux’s. she’s the town judge.”
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