geyo
the roomate you dread-they act how the name sounds…gay-o. they will live on your xbox and never ask for permission, and pester you endlessly while u play it. you will probably be driven to p-ssword protect your xbox, a sad sad day indeed. worse comes to worse, hide the powercord, lest the b-st-rd child wakes u up at ungodly hours with the same sh-tty guitar hero song that he plays over and over. message in a bottle is a good song and all, but come on. 693 times in a row? you douchebag!
most likely, he’s fat and/or pudgy, with what is known as “b-tch t-tties.” he’s the kinda kid who would wear a t-shirt in the water at the beach…you know, the person too ashamed to let their “b-tch t-tties” flop out in public. this is the kinda kid whos bed you want to move into the bathroom, just to get him the f-ck away from you. god forbid he get’s a girlfriend, or you will never hear the end of it because he thinks he might get some from whatever butch -ss sasquatch looking b-tch. chewbacca has better features than this unholy b-tch, or so u can -ssume. you don’t have to see, u just know…
his facebook will probably be the most humiliating thing you’ve ever seen. when u frantically look him up to see who your new roomate is, you will cry to yourself when u see the scene/emo looking webcam shot, complete with sh-tty resolution and strange color/contrast effects. if you see this, drop out. theres always truck driving school. it’ll be complete with the long, oddly greasy blacker than black hair. beware, this sh-t sheds everywhere… your shower drain will turn into a swirling pile until it forms a small mountain of disgust.
in public he will be unbearable. this devil child will act like the sh-ttiest cartoon character u have ever seen-a tribute to sub-“3 stooges” slapstick, the slightest b-mp in the elevator, scuff on a floor, or other minute daily effect that most normal folks let go will cause a sporadic reaction, generally followed by a cackling enjoyment at his own “humor.” at random points in time he will purr…yes, purr. but not like a normal cat, more like a s-xual deviant would to a child at a bustop…
also, you know u have a geyo when he tries to act like his ancient ancestorial ninjas, or whatever the f-ck gets into his twisted mind….no, you are not athletic, you are not a fighter, sit the f-ck down and calm down tubby, go eat a f-cking rice crispy treat b-st-rd, rather than scream noises in my face and “karate chop” me. best defense, cold c-ck his -ss in his already punched-in, f-cked up looking face.
this sissy will probably show it in some strange way…be it wear mittens while biking so his hands dont get “hurt” or “sore,” because god forbid he cant wack it in the bathroom that night with a blister.
apparently, geyos travel in packs…they will bring their loud, obnoxious, and painfully irritating friends to your room at obscene hours of the night or inopportune times. for all we know, they are probably all furries….which leads to my next thought. anime.
don’t bring your tv, for they will take it and constantly watch anime. even if u dont, theres no avoiding the loud blaring anime theme music that will resonate in your eardrums until you gouge them out with a plastic spoon. the situation is beyond all hope if the listen to a band called “made in mexico”. if they do, run. dont look back, dont pack, just abandon it all and run.
you probably find youself in a similar situation as described above. you figure, hey, im better than that, ill just ignore it. the sad thing is, many have tried, but almost all have failed…this -sshole will push u to limits u never thought u had. u thought u were a tolerant and accepting person? think again…b-tch t-ts will bring u down faster than the hair falling out of his head onto everything u own. if you have a roomate who has any of the the traits listed, get out fast. it may save ur soul.
my new roomate is such a geyo, what a douchebag……
-pause-
f-cker get off the god d-mn xbox! if i hear message in a bottle one more time im gonna beat the sh-t out of you!
…kill me
a tall black kid that hangs out with queers like shawn coop-ss and levi
(1)gayo
(2)f-go
(3)gayo p-ss the mayo
(4)gizlar
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