glasgow kiss (AKA Glesga Kiss)
the glesga kiss.
i remember my first kiss like it wis only yesterday.
an’ i’ve goat the marks across my foreheid jist tae prove it.
it wis in the west end ballroom, it’s nae longer there they say.
an’ i’m glad the glesga c–ncil decided tae move it.
there wis this wee blonde wumman, she looked a guid wee dancer.
so i dashed across the flerr at considerable speed.
the wumman saw me comin’, sayin’, ‘here’s that bow-legged chancer.’
an’ she hit me oan the foreheid wi’ her heid.
i cannae remember her name, och! it’s a’ the bl–dy same.
i’m bein’ hurled aroon’ the royal oan a barra.
my shirt’s a’ fu’ o’ bleed, wi’ fifteen st-tches in my foreheid.
an’ the doctor says i’ll no’ see for days, because o’ her mascara.
i swore it wid be the last time i’d be goin’ tae the dancin’.
there surely must be a safer way tae carry oan romancin’.
(flerr( floor
(cannae) can not
(hurled) wheeled
(aroon’) around
(barra( barrow
glaswegien slang for ‘headb-tt’
ahm gonna gee you a glesga kiss
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