Hampden-Sydney

an all male college in southern virginia founded before the revolutionary war. a hampden-sydney man is white, rich, well bred, conservative, and drinks more beer than water. it is also fair to say that most hampden-sydney men get more play than any other group of guys in america. sydney owns.
girl: i hear hes from hampden-sydney
second girl: whoa, he must have an enormous apparatus.
girl: oh dear yes! and a comparable bank roll!
second girl: did he just kill a keg?
an all male college in south west virginia where uniforms are required. sh-ggy hair, rainbow sandals, hampden-sydney ribbon belt (with the school crest), and a pastel color collared shirt or polo (popping the collar is an added option to the uniform). many men keep their rifles at school with them. the school is the society boys of the south east they have wasp heritage though they tend to also hold strong southern values. (note the confederate flag found in most dorm rooms). the boys vary in intellectual abilities, but frequently have large bank accounts, high-cl-ss cars, and know which silverware to use. they stick their noses up in the air but not because they are sn-bs… and when you see the head go back and the sniffles begin you know they’re prepared for a weekend of no sleep. the men frequent courses such as wine tasting. hampden-sydney is its own isolated world where alcohol consumption by minors is basically encouraged by police. the men spend monday-wednesday concentrating on their studies and thursday-sunday having s-x and drinking.
officer: excuse me son, is that beer in your left hand opened? and what is in the cup in your right hand?

student: well sir, the beer is un-opened, and the cup contains a brown liquid that looks quite similar to coca-cola… i -ssume that is what it is.

officer: well son, you are standing on the road, so why don’t you step up five feet to the gr-ss and i suggest you chug that beer and enjoy your coca-cola looking beverage.
“one of the more underplayed sociological demographics in this country is the wealthy, genteel southerner from h-sc. too often, we deride the south for its gun racks, or its lack of dental hygiene. but the rich boys of hampden-sydney? that’s a thing. they crawl all over the hill for greek week . it’s the hottest spot in the south during april. genetically-superior babes in tight tops and short skirts roam the gr-ss, usually on the arm of a trust-funder in his early 20s. you know these guys: ralph lauren polos; university of georgia baseball caps, well-worn; and a bloodline that includes a great-grandfather who invented the paper clip, which provides for the summer mansion on sea island” fortune magazine
the article speaks for itself, hsc guy are number one when it comes to money, ladies, and cl-ss.
hampden-sydney is an all-male college in central virginia that sustains its anachronistic community on the premise that all hs-c men are southern gentlemen. generally, the hampden sydney man is rich, white, southern, conservative, and preppy. he is given vast freedom to live as he wants at the college based on a unique concept: personal honor. “a hampden-sydney man shall not lie, cheat, or steal, nor tolerate those who do.” he tries his best to live by that mantra. it is a fact that hampden-sydney is a world unto itself, where public partying is a facet of campus life. the average hs-c man drinks gallons of beer per semester, uses tobacco in some form, loves to hunt, fish, listen to rock and roll (ie widespread, 80’s bands, southern rock, jam bands), dresses well,(polo, lacoste, etc, with camo ball cap), has a hot girlfriend, and fully expects to live well. note: the campus is an island of wealth in a sea of poverty; with that wealth comes great excess at times. it is true that because of the personal freedom (and wealth), frequently hs-c men get away with a lot of things that are plain illegal. but the true hs-c man is at heart a southern boy, honest and friendly, chivilrous towards women, with a code of honor that words cannot define, a sense of brotherhood that spans decades, and hospitality as warm as makers’ mark. he is what he is, and he likes it that way. take him or leave him.
macon game tailgate, 1975:
joe: hi, sir, i’m a freshman.
alumni: really? nice to meet you son, have a beer!

macon game tailgate, 2005:
freshman: this place is cool as h-ll!
alumni joe: yes it is son. have a beer!
hampden-sydney is a place of incredible oppurtunity sheltered in an old south community surrounded by old money, bourbon drinking, hunting boys. comprised of over 1000 men and 1000 acres, hsc is a college comprised of all men who are nothing short of bad-ss. sure some might not be able to get into w&l but guys at w&l could’nt get into princeton. the bad-ss graduates at hsc go onto perform in local, state, and federal service in both the private and public sector. hsc men are not only gentlemen but also hard working academics that take what they study and work at very seriously. the brotherhood at hsc is almost magical in strength that it exudes.

dude that did definition 2: does that dude go to hsc?
dude that did definition 3: i dunno, is he a bad-ss?
dude that did definition 4: yeah, looks like it, he’s with a hott -ss chick.
dude that did definiton 6: sure is, how does someone acheive so much?
dude that did definition 7: go to hampden-sydney.
a place for men who like to have a good time while still concentrating on their studies. all “hamsters” (a deurogatory term used by those who are jealous of our upstanding status as men and not boys) indulge on the weekends, and work hard during the week. if students don’t do this, they are unable to stay in; and to be honest, hampden-sydney men don’t want them there.for those people who ostrasize h-sc for being rich, for the most part, it’s true. but why be critical of being born into something. ignorance is something that h-sc strives to cure. if people are offended by our staus and our confederate flags, it probably means that they are just to ignorant to get it in their heads that stereotyping people is just one more sign of the plague of ignorance that h-sc tries to cure. so if you dont like to have fun, hate getting ahead in life, strive to eliminate relationships based on pure -ssumptions, or feel the need to compensate for one’s own shortcomings by degrading and being condescending to others, hs-c is not for you.
hater 1:hey those hs-c guys are lame, let’s go snort lysol and p-ss out. hater 2:that sounds like fun.hater 1: it can’t be nearly as much fun as drinking beer and hanging out with our girlfriends, which is surely what those hampden-sydney guys are doing right now.
hampden sydney is a place where tradition lives and girls wish. you have to be hot to get with an hsc, but you have to be cool to gain their respect. and no, dressing like a hooker doesn’t make you cool. if you listen to cool music (not dave matthews band), have a laid back att-tude, and know how to just hang out rather than pretend you’re something you’re not, then you’re in. otherwise, get the h-ll out. i’m sick of the fake girls that come to this school— we can see right through it, even if we do f-ck you.
the football games at hampden-sydney are not a fashion show. dress up, yes..but do it because of the tradition, not because of the compet-tion.