Hewcat
hewcat is a surname referring to a northern woman who has both human and cat tendencies. often after eating chips, chicken or pizza, said woman will scuttle of to the cupboard and feast on gourmet cat food. she often od’s on whiskas to the point where she is rolling around uncontrollably on the floor in a spasm. like most addicts she is in denial of her problem and often uses the excuse of having a cigarette out of the window to spy on the neighbours cats lying naked in the garden. she takes a nip of gourmet cat around with her in a hipflask to add it to food when she’s out such as greg’s pasties.
guy 1-‘hey, did you just see that girl she was of her t-ts!’
guy 2-‘yeah she’s a hewcat, you can tell by the whiskas around her mouth’
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