Huffer

a denizen of “the huffington post” blog: “one who breathes in the rarified, oxygen-starved air of ‘the huffington post’.”
“hi, i’m e. feet liberal and i care about important things. that’s why i rely on ‘the huffington post’ to keep me up to date with:

–politically incorrect words/ideas that have been newly banned by the intellectually enlightened

–inane progressive ideology

–the latest dnc talking points

–cheap shots aimed at anyone and anything to the right of noam chomsky

and

glowing reports about how president obama is so totally awesome!

when common sense and reality threaten to burst my rose colored, progressive bubble, i gain solace from being a huffer. reading the anti-american opinions, half-truths and cherry-picked facts re-ssures me that my hysterical hand wringing, misplaced activism, and blogging about the same, is a wise life’s devotion.

amazingly though, there are people who post disagreements with my utopian worldview. they have humbly suggested that my advocacy has no lasting spiritual value–that it’s all just wood, hay and stubble. can you imagine that? for pete’s sake, i’m trying to save the planet from the evils of free market economics!

don’t worry though, during these comment exchanges i call upon my academic background, and ‘rhetorical kung-fu’ skills, to provide a reasoned and enlightened response. first, i stereotype the dissenters as ‘typical conservative, racist, s-xist, bigot, freeper, zionist, h-m-phobe, inbred, fox news, wing nut, hate mongers.’

then, building on that foundation, i am able to summarily dismiss everything that the dissenters have to say because (obviously) anyone who holds a differing opinion from a huffer is mentally ill. (too bad amerika doesn’t have those wonderful psychiatric hospitals and re-education camps like china and russia. i used to love going to camp).

if the unenlightened still refuse to conform to my point of view, or try to cloud the issue with facts, i appeal to my fellow libtard posters for backup. via a democratic consensus, the enlightened among us organize into a gr-ssroots cybermob and bully the dissenters with every ad hominem available (so be forewarned you inbred, fascist sc-m)!

obviously this kind of reaction is a responsible use of power, and we huffers make a difference every day in the all important blogosphere. (because mean people suck, and their free expression is not welcomed on the world wide web).

as a huffer, i am continually working to create a better world. will you help me in my efforts to quash wrong speech, wrong thoughts, wrong ideology, wrong curriculum, wrong rights and wrong freedoms? (the bill of rights is so problematic at times and should be disallowed in red states because it is an obstacle to socially responsible progress).

(takes bong hit)

power to the people baby!”
8 more definitions
someone who is addicted to inhalants. usually involves a rag soaked with some dangerous chemical and placed in a paper bag to be inhaled. spray paint is commonly used. metallic spray paint gives the best results.
“look at that zombie motherf-cker over there with paint on his face. must be a low-life huffer.”
describes a person who is grumpy, narky or has the disposition to go off in a huff
alfie, some mornings you can be such a huffer!
the act of inhaling a powder (usually cocaine) through one’s mouth. often done when the person’s sinuses are clogged.
my nose was too stuffed up to snort a line, so i had to do a huffer
some one who is rubbish at the xbox 360 game halo 3. comes from taking the ‘h’ from halo and the ‘uffer’ from duffer.

g-d dod your such a huffer

haha you huffer
the act of farting into (usually) a females mouth. the female than swallows the gastronomical release and proceeds to snowball it back up into the p-sser of gas’s mouth.
for some f-cked up reason my girl loves it when i give her a huffer.
one who greedily licks on nut sacks
that jack is a f-cking suck huffer