iCult

1. their leader/s may claim a special, exclusive ministry, revelation or position of authority given by steve jobs.

3. they use intimidation or psycho manipulation to keep apple fans loyal to their ranks. this could be in the form of marketing of dire calamity sent by steve jobs if they leave; being shunned by their family and friends etc. this is a vital part of the mind control process.

4. apple fans will be expected to give substantial financial support to the icult. this could be compulsory t-thing (which is checked); signing over all their property on entering the icult; coercive methods of instilling guilt on those who have not contributed; selling other goods for the icult as part of their “ministry”.

5. ipad-based cults may ridicule technologies that take up free-will offerings

6. there will be great emphasis on loyalty to the icult and its marketing. the lives of apple fans will be totally absorbed into the icult’s activities. they will have little or no time to think for themselves because of physical and emotional exhaustion. this is also a vital part of the mind control process.

9. any dissent or questioning of the icult’s marketing is discouraged. criticism in any form is seen as rebellion. there will be an emphasis on authority, unquestioning obedience and submission.

refugees of the icult are usually faced with confrontations by other apple fans with coercion to get them to return to the icult.
person 1: “preston has actually pre-ordered the ipad.”
person 2: “yeah, hes such a douchebag”
person 1: “go easy man. he needs help. hes been -ssimilated by the icult”
person 2: “still a douchebag though”
person 1: “true dat!”