immaculate deception

when newly-weds give birth to their first born in less than nine months.
bob and tanya just had a kid, but they’ve only been married eight months.
it sounds like a case of immaculate deception to me.
immaculate deception occurs when a woman or girl pleads that she is both virginal and pregnant at the same time. she is so skilled in the art of deception that she not only convinces her boyfriend or husband that this is a miracle that has occurred but then somehow get a religious cult of billions of people to believe her lie and then to worship her and her bustard child.
“say betty did you know that jesus is the immaculate deception son of the almightygod ?” ” hey, if joseph is buying that load of cr-p why say anything.” “am i right?” immaculate deception
immaculate deception occurs when a woman or girl pleads that she is both virginal and pregnant at the same time. she is so skilled in the art of deception that she not only convinces her boyfriend or husband that this is a miracle that has occurred but then somehow get a religious cult of billions of people to believe her lie and then to worship her and her bustard child.
say betty did you know that jesus is the immaculate deception son of the almightygod ?” ” hey, if joseph is buying that load of cr-p why say anything.” “am i right? now that smells like immaculate deception to me
a little-known american black/death metal band formed in 1993 by a manic-depressive vocalist david ‘eblis’ bickle and guitarist tom ‘mammon’ gallagher (the latter was released from prison after an alcohol-related accident at this time). while auditioning in new york the two exchanged ideas but thought nothing of eachother until they met their godsend: brutal percussionist and practicing occultist gary ‘balrog’ jackson, who instantly recognized their talent and decided that if a band wasn’t formed at that point, there would be no justice in the world. not long after the trio took up tracveling and auditioning together did they begin to gather converts like a snowball. these included the talented b-ss player randal ‘belial’ everson, who just recently graduated from college, and wolgang ‘azrael’ grubb, whose experimental notions in music theory and keyboarding expertise contributed much to the band’s overall sound. the result was one of the most intense and innovative american black metal bands ever formed.

however, immaculate deception had difficulty financing itself, and before long tragedy struck, for bickle committed suicide in 1996, despite his exceptionally talented writing and vocals, he was never quite satisfied with himself or his accomplishments and thus his death robbed the genre of one of it’s most talented vocalists.

the rest of the band began to lose morale at this point as well, and the band reached a funk that some say they have never recovered from. in 1999, while on tour, randal had wandered off into the woods in maine and has not been seen since. foul play is not suspected, but the mystery remains unsolved and the matter is not closed to the fbi. to make matters worse, gary, though dedicated to immaculate deception since it’s initial forming, died of a drug overdose in 2000. while tom and wolfgang recruited a new singer and b-ssist, gallagher attempted to gain more promotion for the band by burning down a church! he did not succeed, but was caught by police and convicted in 2001. having lost his will to play, ‘azrael’ soon found a more promising career in a technical band called bad intro (is this a joke? i hope so).

despite this constant stream of tragedy and inconsistency, immaculate deception has proven it’s resilience, and with an entirely new line-up is currently active after releasing their latest alb-m “dreadthorne” which remains true to the band’s original sound. the current line-up is:

satanniel (guitars/vocals)
geryon (guitars)
mastema (b-ss)
rimmon (drums)
nisroch (keyboards)
immaculate deception will be playing with metallivore and asteroid! watch out and praise satan!