Irish Suntan


the absolute worst kind of sunburn, caused by falling asleep or working outside without sunblock. or, if you happen to have irish heritage, what you get from spending more than 15 minutes out of doors with exposed skin. symptoms include bright red skin, itching, swelling, burning, intense pain, peeling, developed fear of sunlight in any form, habitual sunblock or aloe vera application, walking like a r-t-rd, lying in strange positions, and setting fire to anything within 20 feet. may also cause one to be slapped with an unnatural fury.
guy 1: patrick fell asleep on the beach. he has an irish suntan.

guy 2: i’ll get the plywood strips.

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