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jensen dagget

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• shawarma'd

  a s-xual act that occurs when a man reaches climax, but instead of finishing, he pulls out and squirts tzaziki sauce upon his partner. the man then pelts his partner with cold pita bread. made famous in east dearborn, mi. wallah habib, i shawarma’d your sister last night, thanks for the leftovers.

• limp guinea

  the moment after -j-c-l-t–n and before flacidity where a p-n-s is hanging at a specific curve. not erect yet not flacid, this middle ground is known as a limp guinea. i barely finished jacking off before my roommate came home, pretty sure he saw my limp guinea

• splatypus

  when a platypus is dropped 20 stories onto it’s bill. did you see that splatypus on the pavement yesterday?

• hannah closs

  the most beautiful, helpful, caring, and litty person alive! hannah closs is full of s-ss, and knows how to make everyone laugh until they pee their pants. example: whoops, i just made that girl laugh until she diarrhea’d herself. i’m such a hannah closs!

• mirror monkey

  all the 20-ish college brats who have nothing better to do at the gym than stare at themselves in the mirrors rather than actually working out. look over there, another mirror-monkey admiring themselves , good thing those 12 inch biceps do not take up too much mirror! lol that guy at the gym that spends […]

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