jessica simpson

a woman who is probably set for life financially, not because of her music career, but through capitilizing on her disgustingly anencephalic stupidity. she makes dubya look like enstein.
d-ck: “think i’ll go kill some brain cells”.

harry: “you gonna sniff some glue with me?”

d-ck: “naw, man. i’m gonna go watch “newlyweds” on empty v.

jessica simpson

jessica simpson
the dumbest b-tch on the face of the earth..proof that looks can get you money
jessica: i didn’t know buffalos had wings?!?!
hot as h-ll but dumb as f-ck!
the two extremes.
has everything a man wishes of a woman:
1. big br–sts
2. big -ss
3. no brain
jessica simpson? that dumb-ss blonde?

i don’t care, i’d still f-ck her.
born and raised in dallas, texas,
she made her first mark in the genre of contemporary christian music. in the late 90’s, she landed a record deal with columbia records. the first alb-m she debut then was sweet kisses which unleashed the singles “i wanna love you forever,” “i think i’m in love,” and “where you are.” her next alb-m irresistable in 2001 was also a hit record with the t-tle track sp-wned and accomplishing the hot 100 (#15), the rhythmic top 40 (#12), top 40 mainstream (#3) and top 40 tracks (#5). her next alb-m is t-tled in this skin, which is described by simpson as “uplifting and real”.

she is also an often extremely overrated girl in terms of her looks. she has a square jaw, square face, square cheekbones, a strong nose with a b-mp on the bridge, lips that can only appear pr-nounce with appropriately applied lipstick, projecting eyebrow ridges, and simple eyes with no flair unless drastically aided by eyeshadow or eyeliner. she would be most suitable as a fairly handsome man if not an average one. only with good airbrushing, directing of her face to the camera, and other means of softening her look would make her p-ssable as feminine. her body is curvaceous and overall nice as it is. her hair appears healthy enough. yet, the credit to her looks lies in her media-attributed s-x appeal, the prancing in her videos, and other aspects of a bubblegum star along with her hair and body. she is indeed a b-tterface.
she also appears remarkably stupid whether it’s due to a bit of acting or not in her newlyweds reality show starring her and her husband nick lachey of 98 degrees.
1.) jessica simpson is so beautiful. she has gorgeous blonde hair and a great body.-no actual reference to her face.
2.) -in reference to face- fairly attractive, don’t ya think? beautiful, even so. -generic and delusioned regard of facial beauty whether it be under that mane of shiny blonde hair, alone, with drastic make-up and/or airbrushing, etc.
3.) she looks mannish with that “manjaw” and square face. -correct-
4.) she looks as plain as a jane, her facial features are so simple and bland regardless of the make-up. -correct-
5.) good pipes, good stage presence, energy, lots of vibe. -decent compliment-
the poster child for abortion. if the conservatives could just see the slight possibility that aborting a fetus prevents another blonde bimbo from starting a singing career, they would quit bombing clinics.
that f-cking pizza hut commercial with the winged buffalo.
1. female “singer” who has obtain millions by splurting out dumb questions and statements. she’s married to another equal semi-famous “singer”, nick, who probably married her because he wasn’t listen to what she was saying when they were dating. crazy/beautiful is the best term for this girl.

2. to be a woman who looks like one of g-d’s perfect gifts to earth, but is in fact an insult to anyone with a brain.

3. to obtain millions for being a dumb–ss.
1. “dude, why you watching newlyweds?… oh my, jessica got her head stuck in the toilet again! she needs to stop kicking, she scuffing up her gold-plated floors.”

2.”we were watching a show about dinosaurs and she asked if it was actual footage… she’s such a jessica simpson.”

3. “he slipped on dry ground in the store, but they still settled with him for 1.2 million. freakin’ jessica simpson!”

←