king crab blumpkin


the king crab blumpkin is prefaced by eating an excessive amount of spicy j-panese food so as to make your blumpkin sh-t as liquid and rancid as possible.

the kind crab blumpkin begins by picking the crabs out of your p-b-s while receiving blumpkin and strategically placing said crabs (pubic lice for you r-t-rds) throughout the hair of the female slobbing your kn-b. just as you’re about to shoot your load, wait until the aforementioned wh-r- is in a downward bob, slide sideways off the toilet and forcefully slam her face into the asian frying oil you’ve been brewing in the toilet. -j-c-l-t- on the shocked, fried dumpling wh-r-.

joe: hey man, how was your date with cheryl?

mike: pretty good. she wanted to spend a quiet night alone so we watched 50 first dates and i took her out to a real nice sushi place. thought i’d add a little spice to the night so i king crab blumpkin’d her.

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