Kirkham
a legend amongst others. stronger than any, and more b-lls than a soccer academy. women fall at their feet, whilst men envy and try to be them. kirkham is not just a name, its an honour. kirkham is also translated as: pleasurer of women. a woman has not experienced true intercourse until a kirkham has ploughed his way through her, forever changing her life. no other man will ever match this female destroying pleasure. if approached by a kirkham, play dead. this is the only way to deter them. a kirkham cannot see an object properly if it remains still.
“sh-t, it’s a kirkham. play dead so you won’t be seen”
“i had s-x with a kirkham, now i’m in a&e”
“i had s-x with a kirkham, now i’m paralysed”
“wow, did you see the size of that kirkham’s meat wrench?”
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