mile down

step one: d-ck slap your partner so hard their heart stops.

step two: once they are 6-feet under acquire a shovel of some kind and proceed to dig up their exciments.

step three: once you open the coffin they are buried in, use the shovel to dig a mile down so when you are committing necrophilia not a soul can hear you (note this may take some time).

step four: once the hole is doug climb out again and push the coffin down the hole. (ensure enough room at the bottom the the s-x pit to allow sp-ce for flexible monouvers).

step five: slip down your underwear and proceed the f-ck any maggot filled hole of your choice. once the maggots have attached themselves to your p-n-s and started making friendly conversations with your crabs continue to sh-t on the skull of the victim, one the hot, steamy load is to the suitable size, watch as the methane fills lump of sh-t melts the face and reveals the victims eye sockets.

step six: once the sh-t has reached core temperature of 40 degrees celsius, insert your p-n-s into the eye sockets and blow your load until the mixture of s-m-n and sh-t streams out of her nose like a the alaskan snow dragon.

step seven: proceed to f-ck the dead corpse in the -n-s, achieveing maximum penetration, leave the maggots to crawl of your p-n-s into the corpses -n-s. once this step is complete you will have achieved the mile down and earned your place on the wall of fame. once on the wall of fame you get a free refillable soda cup at nando’s.
i have lisa a mean mile down, it’s a shame really but nando’s is a priority to me.