nebraska

smack in the middle of our great nation
is a state that requires some explanation.
to east and west coasters who’ll come right out and ask ya’,
“is there anything of interest in the state of nebraska?”

it’s true we don’t have mountains all decked out in snow,
but we do have the world’s biggest live chicken show.
we’re the makers of spam. we invented kool aid,
and this is where the first reuben sandwich was made.

our insect, the honeybee. our bird, the meadowlark.
the strobe light, our creation, works best in the dark.
governmentally speaking, we’re a freak of nature.
since we have the only one-house state legislature.

on arbor day, when you plant a tree,
remember that it started in nebraska city.
we were once called a desert, but that name didn’t take,
since we have the country’s largest underground lake.

we have the world’s largest forest, all planted by hand,
and more miles of rivers than any state in the land.
the college world series calls omaha “home,”
and yes, this is where the buffalo used to roam
(until we shot ’em).

we were the first state in the nation to finish our interstate section,
and the first to run two women in the gubernatorial election
(against each other).
we invented 9-1-1 emergency communication,
and we’re the number one producer of center pivot irrigation.

our woolly mammoth fossil is the largest ever found,
and our monumental “carhenge” is certain to abound.
we have several museums that could be called odd,
dedicated to chevy’s, fur trading, roller skates and sod.

in blue hill, nebraska, no woman wearing a hat,
can eat onions in public. imagine that!
we built the largest porch swing and indoor rain forest,
and anyone who visits is sure to adore us.

so pack up the kiddies, the pets and the wife,
and see why nebraska is called “the good life.”
(oh gosh — it doesn’t even once mention football?!?)
hey, let’s go visit the spam factory in nebraska!
yes, it’s actually a state, and no, we do not ride cows to school.
nebraska- the state known for it’s football, cows, and …. well, i’ll be honest, that’s about it.
100% pure -ss kickin football team
nebraska has owned colorado for 30 years and will continue to do so.
nebraska…a state where the question is commonly asked, what in the world is there to do there and has more than a million answers…small town fun is best…everything from county fairs, late nights at the bars, watching college football, or some of the best little league baseball games in the midwest…there is never a dull moment despite what you may think…how many places can you drive through and have to worry about hitting a cow in the middle of the road? how many states can you do 100 down the highway and p-ss a state trooper and not get pulled over…where are their tractors fast enough to p-ss you? being from nebraska means that you wonder why other states bother raising beef…you can tell the difference between sweet corn and field corn while it’s still in the stalk…every conversation starts with “sure has been dry this year…” you can tell where everyone is from just by the first two numbers on their license plate and you know every county… when the tornado sirens go off, you head to the roof to get a better look…everyone knows you by your first name, including every cop…you know that the 4th of july means the biggest party ever…everyone in your family has a handle on the cb radio…and that’s what nebraska is all about…and oh ya, i didnt mention football…
nebraska is the state smack in the middle of the united states and commonly overlooked.
the best d-mn state in the land. yeah theres a lot of corn and a lot of cows but we got the huskers, we also have omaha which is a pretty cool city in the eastern part of the state. the eastern half of the state is a lot like iowa with lots of hills and cornfields. the middle of the state is totally flat and mostly has irrigated corn and soy beans, as well as the sandhills, which are huge -ss hills where cattle graze, the southwest of the state is mostly for wheat growing, and the western edge of the state looks a lot like wyoming with lots of b-ttes and such. overall its not as bad as people think, nice people,nice places to visit
nebraska looks like iowa on one side and wyoming on the other
the state right in the middle of the good ol’ usa, and the one i’m proud to be from. it may not be as highly populated as california or have the resorts of florida, but there’s a lot of beautiful countryside here that people from the mountains may not get because it’s so flat. but when you’re driving down the highway at sunset and you can see a dark orange-red horizon all around you, that my friend, is beautiful. and don’t diss our corn! dissing corn in nebraska is like going to colorado and talking bad about the mountains, or going to florida and dissing oranges.
there is no place like nebraska!
the best state in the usa. so much fun to live in, there’s always something to do. you may see people who say nebraska is a horrible state to live in and it’s nothing more than a bunch of hillbillies and corn, they’re wrong. iowa has more corn than nebraska, so if you want to talk sh-t, you better know what you’re talking about. people in nebraska love football. nebraska cornhuskers are wayyy better than missourri’s sh-t team and chase daniel (the crybaby who said, “nebraska players spit on me.” like a little b-tch and picks his nose and eats it..) 5 national t-tles and counting.
bill: g-d, i hate driving through nebraska..
john: why?
bill: it sucks and there’s nothing there but corn.
john: (punches in face) go there and say that, then see what happens..

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