Nutwert


a type of nut grown & found only in the state of louisiana. it cramps the fingers so when using the computer you can only type happy-faced smileys. it has also been found that it occasionally gives genital warts, which contributed to the name “nutwert.” the nut itself is a pale pink with separated edges. it smells like fish, until it is boiled, when it begins to smell faintly like roses.
“you know, i think i’ll lay off the computer for today.”
“why’s that?”
“i ate some nutwert after a dare and actually wound up getting genital warts.”
“…so?”
“i really don’t want people to think i’m enjoying them.”

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