pabst blue ribbon

a cl-ssic american pilsner. although i used to think this beer inferior because it sells for $8 a case, you can actually smell and taste malt and hops in this beer. it is a far better beer than bud, coors, miller, busch, rolling rock, or any other american swill.
“if all you have is cheap american mega-lagers, at least give me a pabst blue ribbon”
pabst blue ribbion is the number one choice for punk rockers and pirates. the beer is cheap but wonderful and has a special way of reminding you the next day as you pee out of youre b-tt. none the less this brew can only be described as gods p-ss.
what kind of beer do pirates drink?
p. b. arrrrrrrrrr!
hahah pabst blue ribbon rules!
the best beer that comes in a 30 rack.
person 1:dude, here’s ten bucks get some beer.
person 2: what kind?
person 1: busch light.
person 2: f-ck that, i’m buying pbr?

all rejoice
1. n. the only beer that makes you feel as though you’re looking the devil straight in the face upon cracking open the first can of the evening. it is a little-known fact that in the play “faust”, mephistopheles is, in fact, summoned by the protagonist’s opening of a can of pabst.

excessive consumption of pabst blue ribbon, can, in fact, lead to a hedonistic and sanctimonious mental state known as “the pabst state” (see below).

example sentence: “let’s get wasted on pabst blue ribbon and kill some strippers!”

2. adj. pabst. (folk-etymology, back-formation of past-participial form of the (non-existent) verb “to pabs”) pertaining to the resultant mental state of having consumed too much pabst blue ribbon. people in the pabst state often find themselves involved in the following activities (seemingly without being able to provide an explanation, no less):

-killing strippers
-p-ssing out in ditches
-drinking said beer in abandoned buildings and graveyards
-hitting on unattractive members of the opposite s-x
-dancing and (consequently) vomiting (often at the same time)
-getting into arguments about who found that hot new underground indie-rock band first
-not doing laundry
-making inappropriate cellphone calls at 3 in the morning (see drunk-dial)
-procrastinating
-p-ssing out
-writing long-winded definitions for the word “pabst” on definithing.com

example sentence: “dude, i’m totally pabst right now.”
here is a dialogue from the 1986 film “blue velet” exemplifying the pabst blue ribbon mentality (note: frank booth is played by dennis hopper):

frank booth: what kind of beer do you like to drink, neighbor?
jeffrey beaumont: heineken.
frank booth: heineken? f-ck that sh-t! pabst blue ribbon!
the most storied beer in the history of county fairs. at or about the turn of the century, cletus pabst, a notoriously violent drunkard and dancing fiend, began entering his home-brewed libation in hog and heffer contests at fairs in southern ohio. eventually, partly out of pitty, mostly out of fear of having their children beaten and/or danced with, judges awarded mr pabst’s dirty taint flavored beer the blue ribbon in the open thoroughbred heffer cl-ss.
heineken? f-ck that sh-t. pabst blue ribbon!
1. the best-cheap beer in the world; well known punk-rock beer. also known as pbr.

2. yum
i took my last $10 and bought a sh-t load of pabst blue ribbon!
n. packs a good whollop and sits nicely. to drink a lot and not feel heavy. to enjoy at a good cost and achieve the feeling desired. to experience true delight and full flavor.
yes sir this is cheap, and yes it will make you feel great, and yes it has more cl-ss and flavor to it than commercialized beer. just quit yappin and get me a pbr!